Self Love & Mindset Coach@kay_ska

💛I help people to build a better relationship with themselves&their bodies
🎉Founder of award winning MH Blog @mh_stories_
Holistic & ethical lifestyle

467 posts 54,878 followers 194 following

Self Love & Mindset Coach

Just pause for a minute. Breathe in and out. Notice, how is your mind today?
And let me know in the comments below, in one word, three or in a paragraph, whatever feeels right to you!

Checking in with ourselves on a regular basis is one of the most important thing we can do for ourselves and our mental health. Not just looking out on the surface, but reallly tuning in, what is going on there?

This seemingly simple, yet important question is how I often break down any uncomfortable and overwhelming feels. Acknowledging that yeah, actually my mind may feel pretty tired or scattered today, which overall makes this monkey mind to be more anxious, emotional or overwhelmed.
It’s because of that acknowledgment, that awareness I can then look at the things that can help to improve how I feel.
Or if the mind feels particularly good, I take a moment or two to really appreciate that. Those moments are more regular now, but I wouldn’t have been able to appreciate them as much as I do if not of those more uncomfortable times☺️🙏🏻.
I have designed this simple, yet powerful design which is out NOW! How’s Your Mind Today can be used as a mental health conversation started. Or just as a checking in moment for ourselves.
It is of course ethically made from 100% organic cotton and printed in the UK in a renewable energy powered factory, link in my bio ( ). * I’m wearing kids size 9-10 years old. The tee is unisex/men’s size so you might want to go a size or two down if you’re looking for more of women’s fit.


Self Love & Mindset Coach

I am such a sucker for the little things. That’s why when I was finding these little reminders around the house that my mum left, they left me feeling so incredibly emotional and so grateful.

These are the kind of things that in times of anxiety and overwhelm I often forget.

Such a simple reminder, yet I know for me and anyone else who has ever struggled/struggles with anxiety it is such an important one. Whenever anxiety creeps in I can feel my body tenses up and my breath becomes more shallow.
The fight or flight response isn’t fun. But what can really help it is BREATHING. Not necessarily deep. Just conscious breathes, in and out.

Trusting something greater than me has been a powerful and really needed thing in my own recovery. Something I very much overlooked before.
Believing that the Universe has always got my back. Trusting myself and this process (even when it feels uncomfortable) helps to decrease the anxiety and it really grounds me.

“Only love is real, everything else is an illusion.”
Did you know that Fear and Love cannot coexist? You have the choice which one you choose. For majority of my life I chose fear. But, now, I’ve become so much more aware of those patterns and every time fear wants to creep I make conscious effort to choose Love more often now.
Unconditional love is powerful healing tool.✨

I would love to hear about the reminders you would choose for yourself, what three words would they be?☺️


Self Love & Mindset Coach

I came out as bi last year, but have been coming out to myself for yearssss before that.

I can talk to you about mental health, traumas and all kinds of vulnerabilities. But yet talking about my sexuality feels kind of weird?
Like, do we reallllly have to have this conversation? Do I really have to tell 50k+ of you my sexual preferences?
The short answer is no, of course I don’t need to. But, time and time again I see just how much sharing our own stories has the power not to only heal ourselves, but the people who read those stories.
It is through reading other people stories about being bisexual that have helped me to come out. And that’s been such an essential part of my Self Love/Acceptance journey. •
You don’t need to feel like you need to come out to anyone but yourself. But, I do also know just how challenging that can be.
Some things that really have helped me to get my head around bisexuality before I came out:
- You don’t have to like men, women and gender nonconforming people equally.
- You can be monogamous and still bisexual.
-Dating mostly people of your opposite sex doesn’t delegitimise your bisexuality.
- Taking longer to realise you are attracted to the same sex doesn’t make you less bi. If anything, it means you grew up in a culture where heterosexuality is the default.
- You do not have to justify your bisexuality to anyone, ever!


Self Love & Mindset Coach

Throwback to the time I was trying really hard to befriend a seagull. It didn’t quite work, but at least it didn’t attack me or pooped on me!🙌🏻
Can you believe we are approaching the end of summer!? Summer is my fave season and it always makes me a little sad to see it go. I would much prefer to live in my summer dresses all year round than wear layers of clothes and be constantly cold😬!
Nevertheless, this was probably one of the best summers (mental health wise) I have had in maaany years! I feel like I’ve been able to actually see just how far I’ve come. And I can tell you the hard work you put in in yourself and things you care about always pays off!
Big wins for me has been the feeling of being so much more free in my body. The acceptance I have towards it, rather than all of the judgments I used to torture myself with. The gratitude for what it does for me. The self confidence and self belief that has been growing and allowing me to pursue different opportunities and things that have been so out of my comfort zone!

I would LOVE to hear in the comments, about what went well for you this summer, your wins, accomplishments or best memories?☺️🌊


Self Love & Mindset Coach

Sometimes we have to feel so sick of our own shit to actually start making positive changes.

Are you sick of your own shit yet? Are you sick of sabotaging your own growth? Or maybe you are assuming that EVERYONE else’s life is much better than yours?
I know that for me only thanks to the super shitty times I’m able to actually feel so much joy and appreciation for my life now.
I’ve been able to find the gratitude and forgiveness for the physical, emotional and sexual abuse I’ve experienced. I’ve been to very dark places, that’s why I’m able to appreciate the light so much more!🙏🏻
I stopped feeling like the victim of my own life, stopped feeling sorry for myself and instead started to take charge of the now! Not fixating on the past, and instead focusing more on growing and making my future better. One day at a time.
You have the choice, the POWER to change your life for better!

What is ONE thing that you can do today that your future self would thank you for?


Self Love & Mindset Coach

I had the pleasure of filming with @bbcnews and talking about such important topics.
If you’ve missed it on TV or don’t live in the UK here’s half of the bit that I was in. The full segment of it is now on my IGTV.
For someone who has spent years of my teenage years self harming it’s been really important for me to talk about it. Especially with all of the dreadful, new stats that have come out about the numbers of teenagers that self harm.

Even though these stats are not a surprise to me, it still breaks my heart knowing just how many young people are really struggling. There still isn’t enough done about it!

It’s almost been three years since I created @mh_stories_ and from day one I knew that I wanted to use my voice in a positive and impactful way. I never imagined I would be this comfortable talking about my own story. Even though this was really out of my comfort zone, I’m proud of myself for doing it and being that voice I’ve set out to be!

I just hope that bringing more and more awareness to these subjects will eventually bring out more change. Especially to the education and health systems!

If you are struggling with your mental health and self harm I want you to remember that you are not alone. There is a way out of this darkness and know that this can and will pass. Better days are ahead, I promise you!
And most importantly, your feelings are valid and you deserve to feel better and seek help!🙏🏻


Self Love & Mindset Coach

How much of what you see on Instagram and social media is actually real?
How much of what you see do you compare yourself, your body, your relationships and your life to?
How much do you filter your own life before you put it on social media?
No one looks ‘perfect’ all of the time. No one constantly walks around posing, sticking their ass out and breathing their stomach in so much they can’t actually breathe. No one has their shit together all of the time, even when they have what might seem like a ‘perfect’ feed.

My favourite thing about wearing high waisted shorts or jeans is unbuttoning them!🙌🏻 #freedom Nothing feels better than being able to breathe properly!😅 Even if that’s not the kind of image you might want others to see, being yourself and feeling comfortable in your own body matters wayyyy more than what it looks like!
Imagine what our lives and social media would actually look like if we didn’t filter so much of it? Saying things we actually feel, posting the photos we want to post without judging ourselves first and not feeling scared of what others might or might not think of us?


Self Love & Mindset Coach

Just your daily reminder of how ENOUGH you are, jus as you are, right NOW!🙏🏻❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

It’s one of the reminders that I often need myself. I would be lying if I said I always feel enough, I don’t. I’m only a human. I have my own insecurities, self doubts and a monkey mind.
But, that doesn’t make me any less worthy of being kind to myself! And reminding myself, sometimes over and overrr again, that I AM ENOUGH and so are YOU!☺️🌻✨

PS Forgot to put my handle on this, so pls kindly tag me in it if you’re reposting this picture☺️🙏🏻✨


Self Love & Mindset Coach

Mental health issues don’t have a certain look. Your suffering isn’t any less valid because you don’t always look like the picture on the left - I don’t either.

Anxiety has so many different symptoms. For someone who’s struggled with agoraphobia for years, in the picture on the right I was actually a lot more anxious than in the one on the left. There might have been more visible discomfort there, but on the other hand majority of anxiety / panic attacks aren’t actually visible!

My main purpose for creating @mh_stories_ was and still is to show people that it doesn’t matter their age, gender, race, or economic status, mental health issues can affect anyone. But, oh wait! You can’t TELL from smiley pictures that someone’s struggling?! And that’s the whole point. That’s why there is still so much stigma around mental health. YOU CAN’T SEE IT. But, does that make someone else’s struggles easier? Certainty not!

Invisible illnesses are real and they shouldn’t be taken lighter than physical health.

If you are struggling right now, I just want you to remember that you are not alone.
You are stronger than you think!
Anxiety can be extremely exhausting, so please be kind to yourself.
You are ENOUGH, even when you’re struggling!🙏🏻✨


Self Love & Mindset Coach

Ahhh, nothing makes me more happy than a good, juicy watermelon!😻🍉💦

For someone who has struggled with eating disorders and body dysmorphia for majority of her life, I’m so happy to be able to actually have more mindful relationship with food now!
Changing my relationship with food was probably one of the biggest and most important thing in my own recovery (and most challenging one too!). Actually viewing foods as an essential fuel for my body, choosing more of foods that nourish my mind AND body. Letting go of the guilt (or shame when binge eating) I had previously attached to eating. Rejecting the diet mentality and any of the labels it puts on different foods. Listening to my body, honouring hunger just as much as honouring fullness. .
The recovery process is fulllll of growing and learning. And reminding ourselves to be kind to ourselves through EVERY single step of it🙏🏻. We are always ENOUGH, exactly as we are, RIGHT NOW☺️✨
Tshirt @ethcs (you can use kayska at the checkout to get 10% off!)
Dungarees @lucyandyak #ethicalfashion


Self Love & Mindset Coach

Self Love is not something outside of you. The love that you seek is already within you.
It is so incredibly important to take time off for yourself, to recharge and to allow that energy of Love within you to grow!
It is available to every single person in the world. And it available to YOU right now!
Often times, we might feel guilty for taking time just for ourselves. Feeling like we have to always be there for everyone else, worry about every single thing we see on the news and feel awful that there’s not much we can do to help. But actually, not feeding into those things and others drama is probably the best thing we can do for ourselves and for everyone around us!
Charging your own love and making your self care a priority is not selfish. It’s one of the most important things you can do for yourself and your own mental health!

What are the things that recharge your battery?☺️✨
If you are seeking one to one guidance to help you with finding more balance in your life, body image issues, confidence or any aspects of self love (including & not limited to self care, self acceptance, self trust) send me an email to or DM for more info on my Self Love + Confidence coaching sessions. My approach comes from my own personal battles (+qualifications & courses I’ve completed) with PTSD, self harm, anxiety, eating disorders, depression and body dysmorphia.


Self Love & Mindset Coach

Have you ever seen sunflower grow?
I’m super grateful to have been watching quite a few of them growing in our back garden this year. And let me tellll ya, they take their blooody time!

BUT, look at their stem! It’s one of the thickest ones you’ll see in flowers. And that’s for a good reason, right? Building that solid foundation to be able to hold themselves up and grow talll!

That’s kind of what I think about the recovery process, we are building our own foundations, that will help us to stand tall in this world of chaos.
We might not have yet (or feel like we haven’t) fully blossomed, but we are working hard nonetheless!

Every time I feel fed up and inpatient with this whole process, I try to remind myself how far I’ve already come and how strong my foundation already is. And it’s only getting stronger.

Some blooming processes take more time than others. Be patient with YOUrself and your own journey.🙏🏻

PS. I always love finding creative things I can do that don’t involve me being glued to my laptop or phone, so yup, this is from my art journal!😅🌻✨