I haz a vision to building my own school called de Phillip University of Food Ninjas where doggo from around de world will be able to come and learn de art of ultimate stealth food ninja ing it a v v fine art u see and I want to be de one to show de world how it can be done. “Stealthiness. Mindfullness. Awareness.” Will be our motto. Enrolments start soon.
Are we A) Tired from chewing somefing we shouldn’t have B) trying to act innocent by giving direct but gentle eye contact C) too full to move bc dat fing we shouldn’t have been chewing on was a full raw roast dat mum left on de kitchen table or D) all of de above?
Thoughts of any Staffy u know 1) Wow u looked at me I love u here let me come there so u can touch me 2) I love u so much like unbelievably much did I tell u how much I love u 3) is dat food I can smell on u 4) I’m v grateful for u. Mostly ur hands, pls pet me. 5) show me both ur hands I fink ur holding a sandwich in de other one 6) kiss my face and let me kiss urs 7) u going to de toilet I love de toilet I come too 8) u making de bed let me jump on it to make it 10 times harder for u 9) u can play with ur phone/laptop in one hand, de other one iz for me. 10) dats right I gotta remember to chase next door neighbors cat 11) u going in de car I love de car! 12) I still don’t believe u don’t have a sandwich there somewhere pls share 13) let me put my face right up to urs all de time u know I gotta be v close to u 14) don’t vacuum de house u know I fink dat fing is out to get me 15) ur busy doing somefing dat doesn’t involve me? Cool. I’ll just whine right here until u finish
Since I iz seven now I figured I’d take Dads car for a spin to de beach was scared for my life turns out I not dat great behind de wheel anyway I here now and looking v cool in my muscle tee just waitin for de ladies to come on by got my keys out in front of me so dey can tell I got my own car just waiting for dem all to line up any minute now I sure
What a day! 7 is so much fun! We had de bestest day ever ever ever! Fank u all v v much for sending me so many messages of love I feel so special! I had a huge pizza cake and lots of treats! We went for a v long morning walk and den I passed out in de living room for two hours after dat. Dis afternoon we went mountain hiking which wasn’t dat good if I’m honest bc u know exercise but DEN!! We got a huge ice cream! I can’t believe I’m sayin dis but I might even be all fooded out for de hour! I’ll definitely need a good hour before wanting a real pizza for dinner to top it off. I’ll keep u posted ♥️ Love Philly xxx
Mum n me baked Philly a super duper special Birfday cake today! Well, I halped by taste testing and I did a v v good job! Happy to report dat I didn’t eat de finished project and now we have a big surprise for philly tomorrow! Before u watch dis see if u can guess what de cakes gonna be..... I give u a hint... it’s phillys favourite fing in alllllll de world!
P: Repeat after me. “No mum I don’t know why on earth de online grocery order u did had no bread in it” D: But Philly she’s going to know!!... P: I said!....Repeat. After. Me. D: Ok ok I’ll do it!! can u let me go now I struggling to breathe here P: glad we understand eachother