Parent shaming is one of the biggest thorns to a mother’s side. As if continually facing our own brokenness isn’t enough, nurturing ‘from scratch’ another human being, is of the most difficult missions in life. We all make mistakes—every parent has, and will again. Yet our ‘critiquers’ with ‘no holds barred’ assertions, place our characters on trial They haven’t walked half a block in our shoes, yet take the liberty to judge our hearts
Now there’s constructive criticism, and then there’s the ‘other’ criticism. My first-in-line validity measure to a person’s intent and involvement is the nature of the approach—is it passive-aggressive, dismissive or condemning in nature? Here’s how to know: ‘constructive’ criticism contains a crucial element that cynically-inspired criticism won’t: truth in love. No truth ‘with’ love? Not valid.
Short of abuse: your child ‘is’ your business. It’s a humanly-motivated move to gaze down at another’s parenting failure with a ‘well, you’ve should’ve done..or thought about...’ disposition
Who knows intimately your personal journey? Your imbedded history is privileged information—from where you’ve begun, to what you’ve survived. So without facts, any character case against you holds zero merit
The parent-child relationship is personal. We love and desire God’s blessings for our kids. And if your way differs from your neighbor’s, it doesn’t rank you above or below them—but an attitude of judgement, kinda does. We all lined-up to the parenting plank, equally blindfolded. Why callously shake a fellow parent’s balance? Aren’t we all in the ‘same boat?’
I know you fail. Yet I know you’re loving those babies your absolute best anyway. How do I know? Well, I’m a momma too. Like you, I ‘love it out’ everyday. I stand doorway to my sleeping children’s rooms and replay my part in their day; I lay and question every decision I’ve made for them; I pray fervently over their lives. But my heart knows when my work’s done, our grace-giving Father will cover my multitudes of failures. And then I’m reminded, for them he chose me. And at the end of the day we don’t answer to anyone else, because he too chose you