Trigger Post Warning
I want to talk about something that’s so important but can be difficult to discuss. The transition period between new medications, WITHDRAWALS .
This transition can be the most excruciating part of having a chronic illness. We feel like test subjects being thrown in and out of medications, trying to make us “better”. Doctors warn us about the side-effects for STARTING a medication, but they don’t talk how incredibly debilitating it is to get off of it... Especially how it will fuck with our mental health! I am sure all my spoonies can relate in one way or another.
The long dark nights with no sleep and constant pain, wondering how am I going to make it. Hands and knees on the bathroom floor, naked, vomiting, sweating profusely, throbbing pain, holding myself in the fetal position with a towel raped around me. My mind is not mine right now, my thoughts are no longer in control. Depression and crippling anxiety chooses what I think about. No control or relief in sight and somehow we push through in silence.
Switching medications is just a part of life now. We have gone through this withdrawal process so many times and each time it gets harder. The medications become stronger and so do the withdrawals.
There is sooo much more so say, so I am hoping to hear some stories from you strong brave pain warriors!