to be honest with you,
i had lacked the core for pure joy inside my soul for a long time.
i lived, i found myself laugh, giggle and smile, and i did love. but for some reason, for all my passing days before i had met you, i felt as if i was missing something. it was important, it was even vital. i felt as if i had been missing it, despite how much i pined for it, despite how much i wished i wasn't.
but i soon met you, jimin.
one day i came across you.
i wish i had been smart enough to record that day, but i had never expected such a day that'll fill my heart's core to come so soon. but it did.
and since then, i have found myself to be a much more love-borne person than i ever could think of myself to be.
because of you, i feel a sense of affection i never quite felt i had the ability to feel before.
and most importantly,
i was not missing that part of me that was missing before.
you found it for me.
jimin, you discovered tenderness , warmth, love; and you placed it somewhere deep into the vastest expanses of my soul.
you found the part of me i thought i would never receive. and i have to thank you for that. thank you, so much for giving me the hope, the aspirations, the comfort my soul longed for. it was deeper than anything i have felt before, it was pure and embracing.
and it was you.
you, the way you fondly place your words, your love bubbling up to the surface and pulling me in. it was you.
and no longer did i feel as much hesitation as a sensitive person i had before, because you absorbed my every shiver.
no longer did my tears flow down my neck, because you pressed a tissue up to my cheeks and wiped my sadness away.
no longer did my frowns wallow and pull me down further, because you held me with both your arms and helped me up from every upsetting moment i came to.
and i knew it was you.
you can't really pull me forward when i run on track and feel tired, but i feel the air of your existence push me to continue.
you aren't really here by me physically, but you protect me.
you can't hold me physically, but i feel the hearth and warmth of your hugs.
you're someone i will love for a long time.
and the time is longer than you imagine.