I bow down in tears
The concrete jungle I grew up in taught me about order. It taught me about straight lines and sharp corners. I learned to navigate it, I learned to survive here. Armed with a screen in my hand and a foolish lack of focus in mind. Here my mind shifts from thoughts to sorrows, to needs, to musts, to desires and back to thoughts. Everything is urgent, everything must happen now! Everything and everyone is hectic and time still always seems to run faster. Chaos, but neatly in order. Refuge is often two dimensional. It is aired every Tuesday 8pm. And you watch it..and watch it..and watch it. You grow up to understand and like the intricacies of a system that seems deeply romantic until one day...you're there!
Everything is new and unfamiliar. The order you're used to is no more. The only straight line is the ever hiding horizon and sharp are thorns and beaks and teeth and claws. Myriads of noises screaming at you from all directions and eyes watching while heat and humidity wear down your body. Your screen is useless now, your focus is crucial. But you never learned to navigate and survive here. Everything is overwhelming and your heart is racing up to this one moment..You stop, you take a knee, you touch the earth. As your eyes close, your breathing is silencing the noises around. Your mind loses all thoughts and finds peace. You can only sense what is touching your soul. First you smell the soil, then you hear a bird and another one and another one..you hear the insects calling for mates, you hear the monkeys checking their territory, you hear twigs breaking in the distance and dew dropping into tiny puddles held by the leafs in the canopy. Time has stopped for you now. What used to be overwhelming and chaotic began to unravel for you. Your eyes are still closed but you can see everything! You can see with your ears, you can see with your nose, with your hands and bare feet. Everything becomes one and as you open your eyes for the first time in your new life, it is followed by a smile because you are surrounded by purity, by beauty, by perfection. By raw and real wilderness to which I bow down in tears..