Day 6 #INTOTHEDEPTHS
Tell us how you play and what needs to TRANSFORM asap to change the relationship interactions in your life. Who do you play emotional ping pong with? How does your voice tone change during the game? What are the areas of conflict involved in the game?
Vulnerability at it’s best about to go down here.
The person I play Ping Pong with the most would have to be myself. There are all types of conversations, interaction and crippling disagreements that take place in my own mind.
I am my best friend and worst enemy.
This process takes place and displays itself as me shutting down, putting up a big friggin brick wall (scared to let people in and see the real me), having little to zero patience (because I am so incredibly frustrated at myself) and unfortunately using food to push down any emotion that surges up.
Using food as a coping tool is probably something that I have done for a really long time. Most of the time, this game of ping pong doesnt come into play, but when it does, boy do I know about it. I have learnt over the years to identify the behaviours that trigger me, the feelings, the emotions and I have a multitude of other effective coping mechanisms that I implement like using my oils, moving my body (especially @butiyoga) or checking in with my amazing Mum and friends to feel their support.
But honestly, sometimes the emotions are way TOO big for me to think logically and the only thing that is going to make it appear better in that split second, is a whole lot of carbs, usually in the form of rice crackers, granola or fruit and nut mix.
This Ping Pong game then intensifies and continues with me beating myself up for failing to get on top of the emotions, feeling guilty for using food as a coping mechanism (rather than to nourish my body), hating on myself and questioning how I am going to support and empower women as a health professional when I can get my own shit together.