(Part 1/2) Clearly not much has changed since I was a child. I'm still moody (it's a bit more acceptable when you're a child though), I have a fringe (once again), and I'm not particularly fond of photos ( these photos were most likely captured because I was taunted into it). I was definitely far more trendy when I was a child though. Midnight blue crushed velvet! Yes please! Many memories have been surfacing recently. In fact I've been voluntarily rummaging through the past without consciously doing it. These are two of about 9 photos I brought with me here to Brasil, however these photos have been travelling with me for some time longer. Why do I carry these particular memories with me? What story do they tell? Do I miss something about my childhood? I have no answer but I do know that if it weren't for these photos, my memories of these particular times probably wouldn't be very clear. This New Moon and Solar Eclipse in Cancer has resurfaced much more than these two photos. Past habits, thought patterns, heart sores and loneliness I thought I had worked through have all arisen simultaneously. I feel like I'm grieving all over again, but not just for the loss of Lilu and the separation from her dad. I've even been struggling to motivate myself to rise out of bed and get going with the day. The mornings have become challenging again. The nudge to persevere through the day has had to become a strong push. It's quite heartbreaking to be experiencing this lethargy and lack of willpower again, but... This time I know it's temporary. This time I'm aware of what I'm feeling, where it stems from and what I need to do to dance myself back into a space of inspiration and badassness (yes that is now a word). Along with the resurgence of painful memories I'm also receiving glimpses of myself that I actually love. I see these parts and I think to myself "hey, hold up! I actually really enjoy this aspect of myself". I'm seeing the power in little Alexa. The Alexa that is directly connected to Pachamama, the nature spirits and her ancestors. The Alexa that isn't afraid to express how she's truly feeling. The Alexa that speaks up for the Earth and what she believes in.