so today i almost fainted watching several surgeries on youtube of what my future job could potentially be and i passed out.
somedays i think to myself “why do emotions have such strong effects on me?” it makes my heart ache knowing that people make life or death decisions based upon the littlest actions other people commit toward them. especially without a reason. but I understand why. people that may seem like a threat probably have something going on in their own life and they take it out on someone else. on a side note, have you noticed by now that i have been writing in third person view? its because i want to stay a safe distance from all of the drama. just a silent wallflower. anyways.. its not just people that you can physically touch either. for instance, americas president. the size of a log and the iq of a log. and its not just america thats suffering right now. several tragedies and conflicts are happening around the world. international bickering, terrorist threats, the KKK is emboldened, new american tax plans, famine in many countries and so on. if only all of this can go out as fast as a lightning strike. but unfortunately we have been dragged down into this mess just because of the government. that night took a toll on me. that one political night. several people gathered around my tv while i buried my face between plush cushions, i heard the words of disappointment spew from the politicians mouth. i thought it was all over. but guess what. its temporary.
sometimes being a wallflower can be my safe haven. and if you choose wisely, you too. -