"Your goal must be to achieve understanding and reconciliation, not to prove your superiority.
Another principle comes into play as we work to become fluent in the kindness and dialect of words of affirmation. Put simply, love does not keep a score of wrongs; it doesn't bring up past failures.
In marriage we don't always do the right (or best) thing. We sometimes say hurtful things to our spouses. We can't erase the past. We can only confess it and agree that it was wrong. We can ask for forgiveness and try to act differently in the future. Having apologized and asked for forgiveness, I can ask if there is anything else I might to to mitigate the hurt I may have caused my wife. When I've been wronged by my wife and she has painfully apologized and requested forgiveness, I have the option of justice or forgiveness. If I choose justice and seek to pay her back or make her pay for her wrongdoing, I'm making myself the judge and treating her as the felon. Intimacy becomes impossible. If, however, I choose to forgive, intimacy can be restored. Forgiveness is the way of love." - The #5LoveLanguages (for men)
Via: @magisterdaire (repost)