Any time I’m unhappy, the way to return to a more peaceful, joyful, loving state of mind is not to change my circumstances. The way to return to a more peaceful, joyful, loving state of mind is to change my mind. Because that’s really all you have control over.
It may not feel like you have much control over the thoughts of fear and insecurity and worry. It’s not easy. But you just haven’t developed your “attitudinal muscles.” You haven’t been working on disciplined thought. Would you expect to bench 250 pounds tomorrow if you’ve never lifted a weight before? Of course not. That’s too heavy a load. You can’t instantly expect to carry the load of a mind weighed down with negative thoughts that no one ever taught you how to carry – never mind the fact that in many ways we are practically trained to have these thoughts and fears and insecurities and worries in the first place. Likely no one has ever taught you how to lift weights, but they sure do seem bent on getting you to sit at your desk for 40 hours a week.
And I’m sorry to say, but no one is going to come to your rescue and do it all for you. You don’t have to do it alone, but ultimately it's your mind, you have free will, and you are more than capable of taking responsibility for the one life you were given. Someone can show you proper weight-lifting form, but you have to pick up the weights and practice. Therapists, loved ones, and even complete strangers can teach you things, but it’s up to you to practice applying what you learn.
No one will see it with their eyes, but your mind is gonna be so jacked. That’s way hotter than abs. Who even cares about muscles anyway? (Exactly my point about how society [discreetly or not so discreetly] trains us to have insecurities about things that don’t freaking matter.)