I don't know enough. I wish I did. With God , -though, it's always on a need to know basis and He is all I need to know. The thing is, I can say that all day long and I'm still going to want to have more information especially when I hit those junctures on our journey together where He has me hold up for a bit. He doesn't say why and I'm not sure how long I'm supposed to stop. Time is ticking and I'm trying to figure out, do I take a seat and keep waiting for more direction or do I move forward? I keep asking and I'm not hearing any clear guidance. So, I become introspective and I tell myself I'll be quiet so I can listen better.
I'm fairly certain this is something that other people face, because I hope I'm not the only one that sometimes flounders.
God is God in all His Love and Wisdom. I never question that, ever. It isn't that I don't believe. It's more that I want more insight. But I don't think I'm going to get it the way I want or when I want it. I have to trust that He'll tell me when to move and which way to go. This is true for all of life, not just ministry. I'm trying to understand how can I be the most beneficial? How am I adding value to life? How do I live like Jesus in the best way not just for me but everybody else and give God glory? I seriously don't know. Well, that's not true. I do know the Scriptures, but the exact steps and the precise execution, some of that, I'm in need of instruction. While I'm wondering, I start coming up with alternative plans. They unfortunately do not have a warranty for success, whereas God has infinitely superior plans guaranteed for victory. This reminds me of something someone told me a couple of years ago: "God's plans are never harmful." That's good. That means I won't get run over while I'm here. So, I guess I'm just going to sit on that chair, in the middle of the road and by faith -wait.
"Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, "This is the way; walk in it." Isaiah 30:21