#thisonelife

Instagram photos and videos

#thisonelife#Joywarrior#andsoichoosejoy#mauihawaii#hawaii#travel#canon#beautifulplaces#thisismystory#magicinthemess#choosejoy#aloha#livin#ocean#onhurricanewatch#maui#warriorspirit#badassery#morecoffeeplease#wekeepgoing#fredandlulustyle#iloveus#raredisease#tinyspectacularmoments#truth#gratitude#ThisOneLife

Hashtags #thisonelife for Instagram

When I go back to the “befores” of my rare diseases, my life was already so complicated. I was actually making my way into a recovered life. I was “recovering” my life. I was the strongest I had been, the most grounded. Almost 2 years prior I had hit the rockiest of bottoms with my anorexia & drinking & depression & anxiety & ptsd. I just wanted it all to end. I tried to do just that. End it. That was Dec. 2012. But I woke up. I really WOKE UP. First, I was so pissed. It was a real “WTF?” moment. I spent that next day thinking that if I could not even kill my self right then “What now?”. I was deep deep in a bottom I had never know. A shame pocket I felt there was no way out of & I was in it alone. I went through my house & threw away so many hidden empty bottle of alcohol & poured out the ones still full. I made my self something to eat and cried the entire time I ate it. And then I did other things it is not appropriate for me to write about. I found a therapist. And although it took me a year into recovering my life to open up about that bottom & what got me there, I went to therapy religiously. I talked about my life. My 23 year affair w anorexia. How alcohol entered the picture so heavily the last year or so. And finally on that year anniversary, I opened up about recovering my life. I opened up about all the things that led me to that night that made me want out so desperately. We all have our stories that led us to our addictions. Mine is just so twisted. A lifetime of just wanting to be loved. Wanting to be enough. Wanting to be wanted. wanting to claim my body as my own. Wanting to be allowed to take up space. Wanting to disturb the universe w my voice in telling my truth, sharing my stories. And here I am. It’s so hard to look back. Those parts of me never go away. They helped make me into the woman in the story I am now. All of us need a page in my story. Day by day. Page by page. And none of this was easy. #Joywarrior #andsoichoosejoy #thisonelife #truthteller #thisismystory #pagebypage #recoveringmylife #addictionrecovery #anorexiarecovering #soberlife #mentalhealth #sacredself #warriorspirit #badassery #beforeandafter #wekeepgoing


3

It's amazing what a little white paint can do 😍!! This room is finally complete
•decluttered closet and dresser
• reorganized closet and dresser
• took out decor that no longer served a purpose
•fresh coat of paint (dewpoint by beauti-tone)
•new thrifted decor
•added some plants
•art by some talented makers
•complete
And now I actually want to spend time in here reading, being still and just enjoying it!! Progress is not made in a day.. it's taken me 5 years to see the vision for this room and now I couldn't be happier with the way it turned out!!
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#bedroomdecor #farmhemian #cottagestyle #bohodecor #thrifteddecor #decoronabudget #simplestyle #bedroomstyle #bedroomrefresh #thisonelife #simpledecorstyle #plantspullmyheartstrings
#plantdecor


11

There are many kinds of patience. Many ways to practice staying with something. Whether it is a thought, an action, a non-action, ones breath, ones hope, a repetition, the complete unknown.....patience. #buildingahouse #gratitude #thisonelife #learningcurve


1

Found this on an old note just now. I don't know who said it but thank you. It made me breathe a sigh of relief and say: Yes!

I'm taking small steps forward which feels good, but I'm also still feeling quite weary. I'd hope I'd have gotten past it by now. I'm reminding myself now that this process cannot be rushed. That being hard on myself is what got me here so being extra nice to myself will get me out again.

Today nice means not making myself feel better than I'm feeling. I took a strp forward, now to lean back and chill.

Hope you're cutting yourself some slack too. Go be flawed. I'm joining you.
❤️


9

“Ever read someone’s story and think: This is exactly what I needed to hear today! Your story will do that for someone else.” I love hearing people’s stories. Is there anything better than realizing you aren’t alone when it comes to something big that happened to you? How comforting is it knowing that someone has thought the same as you and has done something you were to scared to try and their outcome was exactly what you were hoping for yourself. I’ve been an open book with so many parts of my life. I find power in sharing my story. But I find courage in listening to others. ///// #thisonelife #isalife #momof3 #legacycompany #foreverlearning #personalgrowth #mom #wife #daughter #sister #niece #friend


0

The only reason I made it out of Target spending less than $50 (only $20) is because I was too tired and got cozy in this new Resting Station. Ohmyhell, my usual Resting Station (aka fitting room or furniture displays) were dismantled. ~~
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They are remodeling and doing strange things to our Target. Change is so hard for me and especially hard for Target. My f💙ck face is literally my face. For Target, their f💙ck face is everywhere. And yet, she is still so so beautiful. ~~
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Clapping for everyone today. Because it’s Monday. Because we got out of bed (I have not showered, gotten out of my pajamas, brushed my teeth... I have done zero things but wake up. THAT WAS GOOD-ish ENOUGH). I love you. I love me. I love us. And oh, thank God for Target even when she is messy. ~~
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#Joywarrior #andsoichoosejoy #thisonelife #truth #laughterisgoodforthesoul #targetstyle #ilovetarget #restingstation #wecandohardthings #changeishard #exhaustedpigeon #goodish #forthelove #fixitjesus #thisismystory #iloveus


24

To watch progress turn into reality.. home is literally where your heart is, where you share laughter, dry the tears, cuddle, hold onto dreams, share secrets and know that it's your safe haven!! Making a house into a home is much more than a couple pieces of furniture and adding some decor... it's little pieces of your heart being poured into each space making it your home!!
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#myhumblehome #mondaydiy #projectsfordays #lesshousemorehome #plantspullmyheartstringa #inspiredtoinspire #homedecor #diymomma #thisonelife #ourhomedecor #jennsfridayfeature #plantsofinstagram


1

Good morning sunshine ☀️ It's been a while since I've introduced myself, so to all you new followers Hi 👋 I'm Anna, owner of Fred and LuLu Vintage @fredandlulu . I hand pick quality vintage clothing specializing in mostly 60s and 70s for modern Women and Men who want a unique eco conscious wardrobe. -
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Here are a few common misconceptions about me ✌️
1) Do you have a Brick and Mortar Shop? I run Fred and LuLu completely from home. I am a one woman show (well with the help of family and creative friends) but everything can be shipped worldwide 💗
2) "I thought you were tall" I am only 5'2"! Objects in photos could appear larger than life 😂 It's funny how many people who I meet online first, comment how they thought I was tall from photos 🎥
3) "you must have a lot of clothes" is something I hear often. I actually am quite a minimalist. I find it easier to have a small wardrobe of things that I really love that can be worn in different combinations with different accessories. -
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I'd love to know you a little better! Leave a common misconception about you and how you differ from that 💬 -
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Photo by @morganchantellephoto ♥️moon phase necklace by @e.m.couture


12

{do you really think God made you, uniquely wonderful you, and wanted you to deny your true self because it might be off-putting to others? I can’t believe that’s true} @msrachelhollis #rachelhollisquotes #bam #beyou #thisonelife #mytrueself #freedom


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Life is too short to be judged by people who don't know you. Honestly at some point, we all stop caring.
#grow #evolve #livethelittlethings #thisonelife #getyourhappy #antiorthodox #beliterate more than #educated #myextraordinaryordinarylife


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Polka Dots? Solid? Or Stripes? Which is your favorite? -
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Scroll left to preview these adorable authentic vintage halter tops before they head to the shop. DM me to purchase @fredandlulu #fredandlulustyle


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Sometimes the little details just capture my heart 😍
#takingamomentintime #thisonelife #itsallinthedetails #nature❤️


7

This felt so good. I’ve missed this so much. Grateful for kind friends. #joy #thisonelife #selfcare


2

I love @brenebrown words. Daring greatly seems the only way through so much of this part of my story since my @brainsurgery. I fought my way to CA to have the top neurosurgeon & his team who specialize in my #rarediseases treat me. God winks fell all around me. And at the same time, heartache. It has been a long 3 months waiting to see if the surgeries for my #glossopharyngeal & #genticulateneuralgia took. Day by day I keep sitting in pain that feels worse. Less & less comfort zones (air, sun, breeze, wind, heat, cold, etc.). I was so scared & anxious about this appt. I wasn’t scared of this wonderful team of people (My Dr. L -neurosurgeon in the 2nd pic). I was scared bc I knew I had made 0 to little healing since surgery. I was afraid to say the words, “I still feel the same. Even worse. And I have new debilitating pain. And w a shaking voice, I said just that. I heard Bardie’s voice in my head, “We got this. You are an effing WARRIOR; you have a legion around you supporting you; that she loves me to the moon.” And I spoke. My improvement is a great deal less than ever expected. Some parts of me are much worse- the #anesthesiadolorosa, the d5 pain, my #trigeminalneuralgia & now ever increasing #occipitalneuralgia. Time & hope were the words of the time spent w my doctor but in great seriousness we discussed that if the surgeries did not work, cutting 2 of my cranial nerves were my only options. It’s like that now. And that’s scary. And w the AD, I was referred to a doctor in Chicago for other surgical options- a motor core stimulation implant in my brain. Ohmyhell. I have been vulnerable. I continue to be so. Afterwards, I felt like a wet noodle. I felt overwhelmed. Not knowing the answers to my wandering of my recovery was so hard & yet knowing may have been harder. Harder for different reasons. I have some sorting out in my head & heart to do. And more patience to muster. I have 9 more months of careful monitoring unless a plateau takes place sooner. In the last picture, it’s me & God sorting it out. I was doing most of the talking-praying & cursing, “If this is my story, hold me closer. Let me be Light”. #Joywarrior


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Found ourselves riding through some pretty amazing vistas....then we found out why....
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#thethingsyoufind #familieswhotravel #seeksimplicity #trekarooing #route66 #thisonelife #aroundtheworldtrailer #freespiritcoaching


0

I found a Peregrine Falcon watching the Swallows swarming .. I think it was trying to do a back bend watching them fly over 🙌🏻🤔 waiting for breakfast 🍽️ #birds #birds #birdsofinstagram #birdsofprey #peregrinefalcon #swallows #massaudubon #northshore #parkerrivernationalwildliferefuge #nature #naturesbeauty #adventureisoutthere #goexplore #notallthosewhowanderarelost #thisonelife #hunting #patience #strengthandbeauty


0

let's spread GRATITUDE ❤️️ TAG your bestie who is always there for you! -
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adorable bffs Jewelry @billysky + @heirloomfox modeling @fredandlulu • photographer @jamiedanno • makeup artist @danielleleiperskincare (love you ladies) #fredandlulustyle #bffgoals #gratitude #styleinspo #lookbook #70sbabe #carnival #fair


11

Your born an original, don’t die a fake. #Sophies #swings #neverbeendone #instalife #oott #blessed #thisonelife


1

What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas unless you post about it on social media. #Joywarrior #andsoichoosejoy #thisonelife #vegasstyle #tinyspectacularmoments #shennanigans #choosejoy #whatnow #loserstatus


5

Omg Babes! HALTER Top Heaven! Scroll left and tell me which is your fave? 💋Here are three vintage #haltertops Apricot Stripe, Reversible Polka Dot and Lavender. I love that anytime you could wear a tank top you could instead put on a HALTER and step it up a notch. Wear with cut offs for a casual day look. Pair with a leather skirt and heels for a dressier night look. Or layer under a leather jacket and pair with DENIM Bells going into Fall. DM inquiries @fredandlulu (Suede Flats just sold) Thank YOU ✌️️ Anna #fredandlulustyle #70babe #vintagehaltertop #vintageootd


7

My clients? Best, funniest, kindest. Thanks #ChamblissLaw who texted this pic, saying I was “at” their dinner— tho I was in Jax. Can’t wait to keynote on Living Fiercely in the Face of Death, Oct. 4 in Chattanooga. Hope to see you there! PS: huge gratitude to #AcclivityHealthSolutions, who walks the walk by encouraging these talks. #sothankful #thisonelife #palliativecare #hospice #grief #livenow


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✨An orb, a woman and light. ✨ I've been shooting some behind-the-scenes #book promo material today. But I had to stop when this #light caught my eye. ~ Wherever I go, whatever I do, I hope I remember that there is always light, even in the darkness. Be it dim or bright. Its presence is what matters. And, that we fix our gaze in its direction and move toward it. #resilience #writersofinstagram #bookstagram #behindthescenes #writer #actorslife #memoir #lifeafterloss #FromScratch #ThisOneLife


6

Good morning from Mr. Joywarrior and I!! Just hanging out in the elevator having coffee. Room for more...join us. This just might be the most epic selfie we have ever taken together and OHMYEFFINGHELL, we just took one. So basically, I just upped my selfie status to Pro-Self. It may be because of him or maybe because coffee makes me Mega Badass. Tricky. We love you. We love us. And now to go pack...and shit. #Joywarrior #andsoichoosejoy #thisonelife #mrandmrs #coffetimewithfriends #morecoffeeplease #coffeedate #magicinthemess #godwinks #tinyspectacularmoments #graceupongrace #elevatorshenanigans #choosejoy #selfiegram #selfieexpert #proself #ichooseus #thisismystory #goodmorningpeople #thisguythough #reallifestory #ohmyhell #raredisease #warriorspirit #badassery #andshit


7

It's Friday and well this week I have looked forward to today!! I got this new pothos lady while thrifting yesterday, a little wash and she is ready to pot!!
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Self growth has been something that I have been moved through this past while and it's taken me through quite a process and yet here I am feeling like the best me is still yet to come!! Thankful for grace and an abundant love 🙌 self growth is a gift to push you, stretch you and shape you... you are intended for great things!!!!
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#plantsofinstagram #thisonelife #livinglifeonpurpose #myenergyisprecious #thosethatwait #heisgoodallthetime #plantsgivelife #mysimplelife #mommalife #selfgrowth #selfknowledge #hesgotyou #youareworthy


16

Friday = cleaning day and I brought up my old plant bench and it's changed the feel of this room and I needed more room for all my plants 😍!! Cleaning day fun commencing....... •
Diffusers on

Country tunes going

List getting checked

Thieves - best smelling cleaner evers plus gets the job done ( use it for my whole house)

Plants being watered and dusted

Coffee being made

What is one of your cleaning day essentials????????? Happy Friday Friends!!!!
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#thievescleaner #yleo #ylcanada #thisonelife #toxinfreecleaning #choiceisyours #oilyfamily #oilymomma #choosingbetter #whenyouknowyoudobetter #homedecor #thishumbleabode #plantdecor #plantsofinstagram #livingroomdecor #plantbench #diymomma #cottagestyle #bohocottage


3

Because snail mail can be written anywhere, anytime. Although, in the air with coffee has been my favorite place to do it. This was on our way to CA. Card via @one_per_week #Joywarrior #andsoichoosejoy #thisonelife #writealetter #snailmaillove #loveyourpeople #makeitagoodone #coffeehelps #morecoffeeplease #onourway #iloveus


4

Scene - beautifully stacked chicken feed in my vehicle. Reality - throw the bags in so they fit. Chickens will eat well, while a new waterer and feeder will make them happy too! All about the happy hens. Soon we will have more fresh eggs to share! Can’t wait to see our new hens lays their first itty bitty eggs.

#doeacres #doeboyadventures #hobbyfarm #thisonelife #itsafamilything #farmlifeperks #presentoverperfect


0

Here's to all 30somethings, the grey in our hair and the age when we sort of stop giving a shit about soooo much!!! #grow #thisonelife #getyourhappy #selfie yeah I like selfiezzz flutter!! Flutter!


21

✨Out of Touch with Reality✨ His wisdom and enlightenment always speaks to my soul and inner self-healing. I've felt this rage of mixed emotions come over me in these past few years. I've started questioning everything about our society. From food propaganda, relationship expectations, religion, social media, love and technology (ironically). This list goes on & on. And I've hated for so long that these outside train of thoughts (anti "norms") have shifted my personality to have such a negative view on society & life. No body is perfect and that's the beauty of being alive. We have the ability to work on ourselves and shift the negative vibrations to positives ones ☘️{Living Imperfections}↪️Going forward I'm going to commit to truly be PRESENT with myself and others. To no longer watch the hours of the day fade away from me. Life is too damn short!!🌓✌️🦋🌻🌍 #live #wherehasthetimegone #alanwatts #myguru #thisonelife #emotionalsap #hadtogetoffmychest #notalonethough


0

Hope
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A feeling of anticipation that all will be well!! •
A mindset that tomorrow will be better

That friendship will renew

Our relationship with find common ground •
We/they will get better

Hope, don't lose it because without it we would all fall
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#hope #plantsarelife #thisonelife #beyourowndifference #heisinallthings #hesgotyou #hopeisalive


2

And yet, when in CA...I’m doing that whole “life begins at the end of my comfort zone” thing. Ohmyhell...it is really peopley here in all the ways. I do kinda love it. I am also practicing BALANCE. I’m being Warrior-ish about. Extrovert-introverting, story of my life. #Joywarrior #andsoichoosejoy #thisonelife #introvertsunite #magicinthemess #whenincali #steppingout #comfortzones #selfcare #laughterisgoodforthesoul #extrovertintrovert #findyourpeople #needcoffee #morecoffeplease


6

She's got a ticket to ride 🎢 -
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Sneak peek of a few new vintage pieces coming up 🍭 -
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Wardrobe + Styling @fredandlulu • Makeup 💄 @danielleleiperskincare • Photographer @jamiedanno • Models @heirloomfox + @billysky


11

Dating my hubby last night and shit. Left foot, right foot and breathing our way through Downtown Disney. You will notice my fanny pack is bigger than my head (to distract you from noticing I desperately need a hairchop for my hair helmet😊 Dear Lord). I only tried on the bedazzled Mini ears because if we bought them we could not send our kids to college. It’s good to just be us for a bit. To literally just breathe. Laugh a little. Get on each other’s nerves a lot because reality. And then laugh some more. LIFE just keeps going and we do too. And I kinda love us. I really do. #Joywarrior #andsoichoosejoy #thisonelife #littleblackdress #datenights #thatsmyguy #magicinthemess #hopingitforward #messybeautiful #perfectlyimperfect #badassery #togetherwecan #getupgetdressed #justshowup #choosejoy


30

Don’t lie.
Don’t make an excuse.
Don’t over-explain.
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I’ve been on both sides of the coin.
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I’ve been the person scrambling to kindly make an excuse or over-explaining why I “might not” say or do something.
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And I’ve also been the person wanting a straight answer.
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Why is it so hard to say that two letter word?
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What I can tell you is that when I am in the position of wanting an answer from someone, it is really hard to get a “maybe”.
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It’s like being left hanging at the end of a good book or TV show.
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When did the un-answer become the proper thing to do?
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There is a beauty in saying no. Learn to say it without feeling guilty!
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Setting boundaries and having an opinion is HEALTHY. It’s a form of self respect. And in turn you are also respecting the person you are giving the answer to.
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Steve Jobs said, “It’s only by saying ‘no’ that you can concentrate on the things that are really important.”
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Let yourself and the receiver of your answer off the hook! Then you can both continue putting your energy where it matters!
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#justsayno #theartofconversation #alliesdiycorner


3

Note to self: nothing involving a feeling of "should" is Self-Care. Overdosing on should is what creates the need for self care in the first place.
Thanks to @bymariandrew for the eloquent picture.


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He may have been named for Bob Weir (and Bob Terwilliger), but this cat hates tie dye. #RestingBobFace


4

Love letters. When I was here in CA having my brain surgery in May, I painted rocks with messages about JOY and left them all around the #UCImedicalcampus when I was there for appointments and my surgery. Bardie and I loved this part and still wondered who may have picked up a rock and what their story was or how it may have given them a smile. Choose JOY. Feel JOY. Spread JOY. It was grace upon grace for me. It gave me peace to leave my painted pieces. This time, I brought a few more rocks AND I brought these beautiful handmade wooden peace’s. A man at our church makes them and he gave them to my father-in-love and I brought them here. It felt right. I left one on the plane. And I have one to leave on a plane on the way home. Just a tiny moment to pass on to someone else. It’s hard to “need” to be at this (thank you GOD) Medical campus. I know it’s hard for all of the stories behind the faces here. I cannot to big things to change the world but I can do small acts with big enormous LOVE to maybe brighten someone’s day. Right? We can do that. It might bring peace to your pieces too. I love you. I love me. I love us! I really do. #Joywarrior #andsoichoosejoy #thisonelife #truthteller #loveletter #piecesofmyheart #passiton #payitforward #spreadloveandpeace #choosejoy #findjoy #kindandbrave #tinyspectacularmoments #graceupongrace #godwinks #magicinthemess


20

It is too damn easy to fall into the failure mindset. I forgot to use retinol last night—fail. I hit snooze this morning—fail. I forgot to cancel that hair appointment and now it’s too late—fail. I thought I responded to that email, but my response has been sitting in my drafts folder for weeks—fail.

And likewise, it is too easy to look around and imagine that no one else ever makes these mistakes. That their laundry never sits in the washer for three days because they forgot to move it to the clothesline. That their drycleaner never calls them to remind them that their shirts are ready. That they mealprep every Sunday and never scavenge trail mix from the breakroom for lunch.

But it’s just not true. And I have to repeat that to myself—it’s just not true. We all stumble. We all feel like we’re running to catch up from time to time. And we all need to be a little easier on ourselves.

Yesterday, in a group meditation at work, I heard this line, “for real, like everyone else, you’re doing the best you can.” Those words rang out above the brash internal dialogue intent on shaming me for not meditating right, and I started crying right there on the floor of the conference room.

I don’t know if this will resonate with you. Honestly, I hope it doesn’t. I hope you’re better than I am at forgiving yourself all the humanity you exhibit, all the times you show up with messy hair, all the moments you get too emotionally involved, all the overshares and the things you said that you wish you hadn’t and the shabby state of your pedicure.

And most of all, I hope you know that you are so, so important to the world. I hope you believe it and operate from that place of comfort and certainty.

And if the failure mindset is painfully familiar to you, I hope you’re open to the positive change making its way to you. “Let everything happen to you, beauty and terror. Just keep going. No feeling is final.”—Rilke


11

Tools of Change


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Me in the “before” of my appointment with my neurosurgeon this morning. Sitting in my travel laundry basket, sipping on free coffee...choosing Joy with #Syd (or with @thesuburbanmonk ) 💙
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I was just Ohmyhell-ing my way through the morning. I had Kleenex stuffed in my pits bc I was sweating bullets. I was passionately anxious. And looking all badass and shit about it in my collapsing laundry basket. And, I was actively hoping my way forward. Not borrowing trouble. Just meeting my self where I was at. (More to come later about my post op. The processing of the event is currently happening.)
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I love you. I love me. I love us. I am so immensely grateful for all of kind words, love, support & encouragement. I adore you for every fbomb dropped in my honor. It has not been wasted. 💙
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#Joywarrior #andsoichoosejoy #thisonelife #warriorspirit #badassclub #andshit #coffeetime #morecoffeeplease #laundrybasket #quietmoments #intheduring #thebefore #brainsurgeryrecovery #raredisease #invisibleillness #chronicpainwarrior #passionatelyanxious #choosejoy #grief #hopingitforward #iloveus


26

Revisited a life time... Do you have a place you’ve revisited at least once per year all your life?? I think... these places give us a sense of peace... when we go back and revisit what we know and where we feel safe, we can find meaningful answers to internal questions... when we revisit in peace- no demand on self or others... it becomes clear... eventually... Then let it be. Be grateful. 😊🇸🇪❤️#itsbeenayear #noregrets #choosewhatsright #love #thepowerofgoodby #thisonelife #letgo #findpeace #trust #faith #ambition #hope #gratitude #suecia #sweden #sverige #westcoast #västkusten #beautiful #environment #family #friends #thankyou #tack #parentshome


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Started the day fishing with the youngest. Doesn’t get much better. #liveadventurously #thisonelife #fishing #dadson


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If you don’t have a daily FOMB, are you even a Mom?
My 5 year old will get a bloody nose, my 3 year old needs his butt wiped, my 7 year old is giving me the history on some extinct bird, while baby is tired of tummy time and screaming... All while I’m fighting my way through the last 40 seconds of burpees...panting and begging... “C’mon guys, everyone just give Mom a minute...please!”
@silkymamas 👈🙌 #mommalife #surviveandthrive


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The best cure for jet-lag. Two wheels and the stunning Pacific. I know I'm back home! #California #SantaMonica #bicycle #ocean #summer #ThisOneLife


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One day, on the end of this life, I wanna be rich of moments that made my life incomparable. 🧡Moments like that one.
Because they will make you richer than all money and things you could ever have.☀️
#thisonelife #richofmemories #sunriseibiza


61

🍦🍦🍦 dipped in Chocolate or Plain? -
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Model @maliojones • Photographer @jamiedanno • Lashes @adrianeesthetics • Wardrobe and Styling @fredandlulu (link in bio) #fredandlulustyle


11

And we are on our way to Orange, CA to meet with my one of a kind neurosurgeon, Dr. Linskey. Tomorrow I have my 3 month follow up at #UCIrvine. Can you believe it? The hope was I’d be going back feeling so different than when I left after my #brainsurgery for #genticulateneuralgia and #glossopharyngealneuralgia. We are supposed to assess how the surgery went. And right now, I still feel the same, if not worse with my pain. And yet, we keep hoping it forward. Maybe I’m just taking longer to heal. I have many questions. Hopes and fears all meshed together like my joy and pain. ~~
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The getting there is very hard on my neuralgias. My nice red face is because it’s burning from the inside out. Fuckery AND a natural blush. That’s the 24/7 and permanent #anesthesiadolorosa. It’s so hard to imagine I could be so miserable because I have such a beautiful face huh? 🤣🤣 ~~
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I love going to CA. I love that my hubby is with me. We haven’t been away together since our honeymoon 18 years ago. Ohmyhell! Right?! I just hate the reason we have to go. And yet. ~~
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On this plane, the women sitting w us is a joy. God-filled. Talking to her is soothing. I told her that even when things feel so very shitty, there are tiny spectaculars to be found. Shitty into shiny. She keeps feeding me great soul food too between the meltdowns. And she’s dressed in all white so I’m honestly thinking she’s an Angel. ~~ And of course, Starbucks. Thank you, Jesus!
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One more plane to go. I’m breathing. Left foot. Right foot. #Joywarrior #thisonelife #andsoichoosejoy #warriorspirit #followup #goingtocalifornia #thisismystory #badassery #godwinks #choosejoy #wekeepgoing


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Yes. This. It reminded me that I read somewhere that the words: "heal", "whole" and "holy" all have the same root word.

It fits. It's a sacred process where we learn to love ourselves beyond the condition, and this unconditional love is what makes us feel whole. That is, it helps us realise that we always were whole.

Powerful stuff. (And yet, even in seeing the value and feeling this peace today, I still say "holy crap" about it too. 😶😅😇) So glad all this doesn't meam we don't also get to be wholly human. 😄

Be good to you. All of you, the whole of you, the holy you. 😘


2

When your 3 year old is becoming a big boy by finding his own socks and putting them on.
You ignore when one of the socks is a hospital sock still living out it’s life cycle in our laundry, and has also become an awkward favorite. 👌🏻🤷‍♀️🤪🥂 #hesthree #almostfour #hospitalsocks


1

Summer fruits 😋


1

It’s pickles pickles everywhere.
#garden #gardening #slowdown #thisonelife #beherenow


0

One of my favorite pics from this weekend. So much beauty captured in this one shot - women, view and grateful hearts.
Thank you @mptf for an amazing and impactful event. Inspiring, encouraging and empowering women. ❤️💜
・・・
#Repost @diannebgray with @get_repost
・・・
@hollywoodjobwhisperer & @mptf thank you for bringing us together! New friends, new adventures — and a post-conference bevy at the best rooftop in town. #newplaces #newfriends #thisonelife #rooftop #waldorfastoria #beverlyhills #speakers #girltime #dealwithit


6

The sweat is real. Giving my mind body what it requires to be fully present, loving and giving. Going within, self-inquiry from practicing yoga, meditation and core praying allows me to set intentions for my day, because every moment matters. This early morning session was liberating. #thisonelife #thisiswellness💚 Make sure to give your body what it needs for Peace #selfcare


3

I've been taking a much needed break and I can tell it's paying off. Yet even though I can tell it serves me I struggle with it from time to time. Do I need to "show up" for my art? Am I failing to do so in some way by taking this break? Am I seeing this wrong and is a daily grind the only way to progress?

Today I reminded myself: you can't go wrong with relaxation.

If relaxation feels like relief that is my own guidance telling me that this is what I (emphasis here) need at this time. Not what the world thinks or believes, not even what those I care about think. What I need.
This phase of not working a while is working for ME. It may not be right for another it may not be right a week or a month from now, but it's right for me right now. That's all I need to know.
So... I'm chilling. Resting. Leaning back. Feels purdy good.
I have a feeling it might just turn out to be the most productive phase of my life because it allows me to get back to myself and then let myself move with the energy rather than against it. Ride that relaxation into action. Can't know for sure yet (this is the part where TRUST comes in) , but I intend to find out.
How about you? Are you feeling motivated and eager or weary and exhausted?
Where are you and what might YOU need?
If you feel like sharing, I'd love to hear.
#inittogether after all.


12

Who needs another day of weekend? I had a nice weekend away, with friends and family. Swimming, exploring, teaching my son how to drive a golf cart and lots of food! No phones just catching up and relaxing. Now to regroup. Wishing y'all a beautiful week ☀️ 🌴 ✌️


2