THIS THIS THIS THIS!!!! This is such a big deal. I cannot emphasize it enough! We desperately want to believe people have good intentions, which is great! But when someone SHOWS you the kind of person they are through their actions, BELIEVE THAT before you ever believe a word that comes out of their mouth.
People USUALLY don't realize how they come off. Am I right?! But it DOESN'T EXCUSE their behavior! If someone says, "I didn't mean to," it doesn't mean they are not responsible for what they did, it means they have something to work on. If they can't recognize that, it doesn't mean you need to let it go! In fact, you would only be doing them and yourself a disservice by saying, "It's okay," because let's face it--it's not okay! .
Sometimes, though, people know how they're coming off but they don't want to admit it. They may be trying to manipulate you, or they may not! They may genuinely feel bad for how they're coming off. But instead of acknowledging it and talking to you about it they SAY things to distract you and try to make you think everything is okay when it's NOT (they probably try to fool themselves too). Which really IS manipulation--they just "didn't mean to." .
Thank God for my therapist for reminding me of this simple truth every week--it's something I'm still working on!
And just because someone does this, doesn't make them a bad person! I'm sure we all have been guilty of this at some point. However, we need to recognize this and not let others control our intuition! You deserve to have and speak your truth!