Erin Gilmore@erintron

Yoga teacher. Your friend.
Here for you + for the me too's. Sharing recovery from depression + eating disorders. Find my weekly playlists on Spotify.

2,774 posts 22,308 followers 1,097 following

I've felt so supported and loved this week, while making my way through it all hunched over like a troll. It's easy to forget and get all wrapped up in your own shit, but we really are here to take care of each other. I don't have to pretend to be invincible nor do I have to try to do it all alone.
A Mom I see in class often, took one look at me and sprinted home before class and brought back giant ice packs for me to borrow. @chelsoflynn held my hand and walked me across the street to get my coffee. @greggandy has done my laundry and made my meals and generally been at my beck and call. A security person at a corporate client offered me anti-inflammatory meds. You all offered the names of your favorite healers in the worlds of massage, acupuncture, and chiropractic work. You took time to check in both here and in person. You asked if I was okay and if I needed anything.
Every sweet word and sympathetic look has been deeply felt. It's pretty amazing when you stop and acknowledge all the ways people show and up and nourish you. I friggin hate having a stuck back but I LOVE being reminded that people really do CARE. πŸ™πŸΌβ€οΈThanks for that.
(If that made you think of someone who holds you high when you're feeling low, tag em! Say thanks. I love you. I appreciate you.)

San Francisco, California

As I listened to the podcast this morning (and soaked my broken back in the tub) one of the main things that I noticed reoccurring throughout my story was that the darkest times correlated with a complete and utter lack of faith. Which is not surprising. And not just having no faith in God, or something specific, but rather having no faith in anything whatsoever. Some of those darkest, most shameful moments were born out of a deep rooted belief that I was irreparably broken and incapable. A visceral fear of me fucking everything up YET AGAIN.
That story stayed true until I met my boo, my everything, my restoration vehicle: yoga (and my faith didn't suddenly become or stay perfect lol we know this). And I really believe that anything can spark your faith again. A cooking class, singing to BeyoncΓ©, running, drawing. Like I tell you at the end of class: there is no wrong way to awaken. Whatever works for you is valid. All you need is for it to be a reminder of your greatness. A vestibule that leads to: OH WAIT, I am resilient!
I am capable.
Meant to be here.
Supremely worthy of love.
There are so many paths that lead to our inner refuge. That prove to us that we need not reach out for someone or something to save us. That remind us we are our own savior. We are God. Pick any path. Walk it. Do not be afraid. Remember. πŸ™πŸΌ
πŸ“·by @frecklesnfro outfit by @outdoorvoices

San Francisco, California

I can't even begin to imagine wtf I'm saying here with that casual sass stance and sass face. Preaching life changing wisdom, I'm suuurree.
And I am for sure preaching life changing wisdom on a podcast with Kellie of @spirit.burrito that was released this week, haaaay! And by life changing wisdom I mean, we talk v honestly about my story.
After we had our call back in August, I had deep and fearful conversation regret. Has that ever happened to you? I emailed her all nervous that I had been too dark or too negative and offered to redo it. I was worried that I just gave you a "what not to do" story with little to no: and here's how it can get better! But it's fine. So, I'm dark. Lots of us are. And that's great. (Also I did just listen to it and it's not all dark! I actually laughed a little with myself, and cried, too. Which was kind of weird but also kind of cathartic. Funny how our brains contort what actually happened in a convo. HILARIOUS anxiety-rewrite, brain.)
Have a listen! Or don't. It's your life you do whatever you want with it. But if you are interested bop on over to my story and swipe up. Or visit the link in my or @spirit.burrito's profile. We talk about Brene, Glennon, Adderall addiction, Over-eaters anonymous, dropping out of colleges, loser boyfriends, what I called the "church of ME TOO" before that took on a much different meaning...ITS FUN. I swear. (Just FYI I fangirl hard on @gabby_denigris toward the end and most likely pronounce her last name completely wrong--SRY GRL. ILY.) If you do listen lmk what you think/feel/wanna share! I'm here for it. Xo

San Francisco, California

This afternoon I got to go to an all girls kindergarten class and do a brief yoga session with them. It made me feel elated. And so hopeful! Looking around their school and how they were addressed made me hopeful that they will have to do much less unlearning. I was so impressed with how they expressed themselves and even more so with how my friend @liliob, their teacher, addressed them. When the room became rambunctious she calmly asked that they all do a shark fin (take their hand like a fin to their third eye/forehead area). They immediately complied. Tuned in, closed their eyes, and mouths. She directed them to take a deep calming breath and do a body scan to connect. I did it with them and am here to tell you: that shit works! Not surprisingly. Brought me non-judgmental present time awareness of myself. Adults should shark fin OFTEN. Simple solutions to simple problems! Feeling worked up? Shark fin.

San Francisco, California

Doing things with powerful women. @ovsanfrancisco β€’
This week! (Lots happening. Is your life really busy too?) Last chance to sign up for the Mentorship Program with me and some other seriously talented SF teachers. (Visit @yogaflowsf for more specific details.)
TUESDAY: 3pm @athleta + @gap headquarters (do you work here? Come!)
WEDNESDAY: 7:10am + 9am @yogaflowsf
THURSDAY: 6:30am @thepadstudios
FRIDAY: 6am + 9am @yogaflowsf
SUNDAY: 9am + 6:15pm @yogaflowsf

San Francisco, California

The inner voice that's not you is a master manipulator. Sly, convincing, and *persistent*. If I'm not vigilant, it tricks me into believing my most fearful thoughts. Which happen to be particularly LOUD for me as of late.

I heard my perfectionist-critic-downer telling me so many ridiculous things as we filmed my practice over the weekend. It told me that an imperfect yoga practice is okay for other people, but not for me. Listening to your body is okay for other people, but not for me. Mistakes are okay for other people, not me. And that acceptance is readily available for *other people* but just not for me. UNLESSβ€” I can look, think, act, breathe, smell, and do everything flawlessly.
These kind of expectations are self-sabotage. They're unattainable and absurd. I know very well they are not reality. But knowing, and actually believing that they're not true are two very different things.
In the same vein, it's all well and good to SAY you're doing the work and being real and authentic under a perfectly staged photo but does that really push programmed perfectionist behavior? Or does it reinforce? Imperfect visuals help us with the reprogramming (and we have a lot of unlearning to do).
Using this picture to retrain my focus. I want my vision to lock onto the emotion in the photo. And to see myself with acceptance and pride as I assist someone in class--rather than allowing my inner asshole to drown out the goodness with shouts of: "Wow look at that DOUBLE CHIN so gross OMG." Be quiet, my inner mean girl. My chins are fabulous.

San Francisco, California

It was a fun Sunday! I got to teach not one, but TWO all women's classes. Come together ladies!!! πŸ™‹πŸ»
I started with @ovsanfrancisco x @rapha for a sensible yoga cool down moment (pictured above) after their women's ride. And then made my way over to the marina to teach a birthday class for a woman that I deeply love and her girlfriends. (HAPPY BIRTHDAY @mereforce1!!!) Really loving this birthday yoga trend that's happening lately.
I've still got one more class tonight at 6:15pm (for the ladies and the gentlemen haaayyy) and! I've made 3 new playlists public on my @Spotify (search erin gilmore). ENJOY.

Outdoor Voices

Having a really...let's say "interesting" moment with my body right now. I turned "treat yourself its your bday" into a lifestyle over the last month and it's given me a few extra pounds. (To be clear, I know I'm not fat. I'm just v uncomfortable in my own skin rn.) I haven't felt out of control with my eating in a long while, but that's where I'm at right now. It's been hard not to freak out about being filmed for an app--permanently capturing this bloated version of what I'm used to seeing. I'm actively hushing the voices that are saying: postpone! You don't look good! You need to be perfectly thin to be filmed! But I hushed them. Because I refuse to reinforce the belief that my worth is tied to my weight. It is not. A few extra pounds is okay. Yup, still fabulous.

San Francisco, California

I did a little story from my luxurious one-person-barely-fits-in-here-bathroom yesterday morning after my 6:30am class. It was heavily filtered bc I was deeply tired. Like, all the way to my soul I am tired this week. Weird.
Anyways, I was sharing with you my beauty routine bc you always ask about it JKJKJK literally no one has ever asked about it--BUT it's a vegan, cruelty-free company vowing to support women. So I'm supporting them. Check them out. (I have a discount code, gasp! Promotion!) Or if you're on my retreat you'll get to try them out! @freskincare
ALSO--check out my sweet outfit above! It comes from woman founded brand @outdoorvoices and they will also be sponsoring my Nicaragua retreat! So you'll be doing good, looking good, FEELING GOOD. We can't lose, people. πŸ€—πŸ™πŸΌβœ¨Visit the link in my bio for more Nica details! (Discount code for skin care is ERINT)

San Francisco, California

Keep speaking up, sisters. You are smart, worthy, and believed. Happy Women's Day. (It's everyday in my opinion, but I like that it's official.) And thank God for Frances McDormand! Did you see that speech? Deep relate to her ferocity and her activist heart. She feels intense and unapologetic. I'm here for whatever she has to say!
Image by @words_of_women

San Francisco, California

Edit: the weird arm flapping at the end? How I ask you to clear your space at the beginning of class sometimes! πŸ™ƒ
I got to teach 3 back to back classes this morning--which I love--but when my alarm went off at 5am, I was tired and grumpy (just ask @greggandy, sry bb). It took roughly 5 minutes into the first class to completely flip my attitude to all about this life. That felt real good.
I rarely share with you what people tell me about being in my class because it feels kinda braggy and obnoxious. But it's okay to feel proud of yourself and today I got some feedback that also made me feel real good, so I'm here to share.
After the 7am, one of you thanked me for constantly encouraging you to do whatever you want and to really evaluate why you're doing what you're doing. She said she'd heard it before but in my class she said it feels completely honest, empowering, and she finds herself asking "what do I actually need right now?" Oof, I love that.
Another lovely woman came bouncing up to me after a 9am class and said she felt like she was about to have the best day ever! Yes, Q!
These comments stood out to me because that's exactly how I'm trying to help you feel. Empowered and excited about your life.
What's got you feeling all about your life?
SONG: Pick Up Bastien Keb on Sayulita 2 in the highlights on my bio (found a while ago on @ashley_andrea__'s @spotify)

San Francisco, California