Flula Borg@flula

Check it out my new Pödcast BOOM TIME!


first sommer in los angeles. i was living on the terrace of my new BFF, david @mrgiuntoli (in backsground, with guitar). david did ask for me to barbie queue some nice german meats for him, so i did do it. (my bratwürste was delishus; i am snacking one in this foto.) sorry for no pants; it was heated outside.


this püberty foto reveals my mama's life philosophie: some people fight fire with fire; my mama fights rabbit with rabbit 🐰🐰
i speak of some puberty times on the new episode of BOOM TIME link in biografie💥⏱️


Did the What the Fluff challenging with Thomas and it was a CRAZY!!!!!!!!


Nobody helped Hans Gruber at the Roasting of John McClane I mean “Bruce Willis.”
tonight 10/9c on @comedycentral
"thank you" (sarcastic) to everyone that did (not really) help me find my detonators:
@domirrera @chrisdcomedy @therealjeffreyross @lilrelhowery @keithhabs @nikkiglaser @davidhasselhoff @buuski @scoutlaruewillis @rumerwillis


McClane and Gruber.
oh hello john. yes, perhaps you did kill me 30 years ago when i fell off the nakatomi building. or, perhaps i merely landed in a swimming pool, applied some neosporin to my face, moved to west hollywood, and assumed the identity of "Flula Borg." not certain which of those stories is true...oh wait. i am certain. it is the second one. 
but enough games, john. 
where the $%@#& are my detonators? -hans
@ComedyCentral Roasting of John McClane aka "Bruce Willis" tonight at 10/9c


Free The Nipple.
danke schön to @ebeisel34 for sharing many gold medallion swim-tips to me. in additions, i am sorry for showing to you my cleavages...but my swimming suit was itsy and also bitsy. #Literal #Breast #Stroke #Phillips66Nats


you cannot see it, but i am wearing my first fanny pack in this foto.
catch it storys of my childhood on the new episode of BOOM TIME link in biografie💥⏱️


In Case of Emergency, Eat Shirt. .
#MadeFrom #99% #Karbohydrates (#And1% #Rayon)


My Fanny Volume > Your Fanny Volume.
(i mean volume like "oh wow your eye lashes are so much large and huge, not volume like "please turn it off your boombox i am napping”...my fanny is VERY silence)


a foto of my favored things as child: 1. chokolate; 2. midriff exposing; 3. hanging wall cocks!
i speak more of my childhood on the new episode of BOOM TIME link in biografie💥⏱️


Very excite to feed the @SuperTroopers some Cop Snacks!